Reflective Practice View more presentations from Michele Martin Earlier this week I was  honored to do an online presentation for educators in Australia on reflective practice as part of the Sidney Institute's online course, Designing for Flexibility. Their topic was "taking risks and celebrating failures" but it really ended up being a conversation about key aspects of the reflective process, as well as some ideas for strategies to try out.  I also set up a page of follow-up links here.  (EDITED 12/15/11--Here's the link to the actual presentation in Adobe Connect) Serendipitously, yesterday Beth Kanter pointed me to an article in the Harvard Business Review,"Why I Hire People Who Fail." (Note--Beth is also curating a Scoop.it on Failure and Learning--great stuff!) In the HBR article, Jeff Stibel shares one of the strategies he uses to encourage risk-taking and learning from failure in his company--a Failure Wall.  . . . we started by collecting inspirational quotes about failure. Among my favorites: "Success is going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm." - Winston Churchill "I have not failed, I've just found ten thousand ways that won't work." - Thomas Edison "Mistakes are part of the dues one pays for a full life." - Sophia Loren One random Thursday night, I returned to our corporate headquarters afterhours with a bottle of wine and a box of acrylic paints. My assistant and I used stencils to paint about three dozen such quotes onto a large white wall in our break room. As first time stencilers, this project itself seemed destined to end up a byline on the (slightly gloppy) failure wall until we gratefully accepted some much-needed painting assistance from my wife. After we finished painting around 1:00AM, we fastened a dozen Sharpies to the wall alongside these simple instructions: (1) describe a time when you failed, (2) state what you learned, and (3) sign your name. To set the tone, I listed three of my own most memorable (and humbling) failures. In the beginning, the wall was met with surprise, curiosity and a bit of trepidation. We didn't ask anyone to contribute and we didn't tell people why it was there, but the wall quickly filled up. Some of the entries are life lessons: "After 7 years of practicing, I quit playing violin in high school to fit in. Lesson learned — who cares what other people think." Some are financial mishaps: "I thought buying Yahoo at $485 a share was a good idea." Many are self-deprecating: "My successful failure is working in online marketing when I came to LA to work in showbiz." Some are more than a little amusing: "I thought it was spelled 'fale.'" This is a powerful way to do public/collective reflection on a key theme. How awesome would it be if workplaces had a new wall, new theme every month? I also think that a Fail Wall would be a great addition to a FailFaire.  One reason I enjoy doing presentations like this webinar on reflective practice is because the process of putting information together for an audience forces me to take another look at things, bring in new resources and then engage in conversation with people on what I share. The act of preparing and presenting becomes a form of reflection that's valuable to me. In fact, from that session, new ideas are bubbling to the surface that I think I can further develop and build upon. Stay tuned for those. _______________________________________________________________________ Sign up for my newsletter!   If you sign up now, you'll also get 15 days of activities to help you reflect on 2011 and plan for 2012.  

I think that every profession has it's "important questions"--the big questions that start to drive us in new directions, that ask us to reflect on what we are doing and why we are doing it. What are the questions that keep us up at night?  For me, I'm thinking about the "big" questions when it comes to career and professional development. What do we need to be talking about? What are the ideas, trends, etc. that seem most pressing to work on and work out?  Here are some that I think are important: One third of us are currently self-employed. Some have called it "The New Industrial Revolution." This is something I wrote about a few years ago and I see the trend continuing. How does this impact the kinds of professional and career development we do with ourselves? How do we keep ourselves current in an economy where we can't rely on a company to pay for or drive our development?  And if much of learning is social, how do we develop if we are a nation of freelancers? How do we learn from each other? How do we create "freelance" learning communities?  Even for those of us who are employed by corporations, evidence suggests that training and professional development are not high on the list of priorities for many companies.  (See here, here and here for more on this). Again, what does this mean for ongoing career management and professional development? How do we decide what skills to develop? Who pays for it? How do we keep learning?  As technology continues to change the nature and availability of work, what does this mean for our careers? If we follow the natural evolution of technology, we can see that more jobs will be eliminated and those jobs that remain will change substantially.  It's conceivable that jobs as we know them could become obsolete for many of us. If this is true, what does it mean for us? Should we be looking at building a different kind of economy? If we do, what role does work have for us? How do we redefine work?  A majority of US workers are disengaged from their work. I believe that workers in other countries feel similarly disillusioned. What does this mean? What, if anything, should we be doing about it?  One of the reasons I think we're disengaged is because so many of our workplaces are dysfunctional and toxic.  What can we as individuals do to start changing these dynamics? If so many of us are so unhappy, what can we do to change things?  These are some of the questions that are running around my brain. What do you think are the most important career and professional development questions for us to be talking about? What big questions about your own career keep you up at night? 

I think and talk a lot about having passion for your work. This great article on The Creativity Post on how your passion for your work may be killing your career has me thinking differently though.  It differentiates between two different kinds of passion: harmonious passion and obsessive passion based on  Robert J. Vallerand's Dualistic Model of Passion: Those with harmonious passion engage in their work because it brings them intrinsic joy. They have a sense of control of their work, and their work is in harmony with their other activities in life. At the same time, they know when to disengage, and are better at turning off the work switch when they wish to enjoy other activities or when further engagement becomes too risky. As a result, their work doesn't conflict with the other areas of their lives. When they are at the opera, for instance, or spending time with their children, they aren't constantly thinking of work, and they don't report feeling guilty that they aren't working. Questionnaire items measuring harmonious passion include: "This activity reflects the qualities I like about myself", "This activity is in harmony with the other activities in my life," and "For me it is a passion that I still manage to control." Obsessive passion is a different story. Like those with harmonious passion, those with obsessive passion perceive their work as representing a passion for them, and view their work as highly valued. A major difference is that they have an uncontrollable urge to engage in their work. As a result, they report feeling more conflict between their passion and the other activities in their life.  Not surprisingly, those who feel harmonious passion for their work, have better life outcomes all the way around, compared to those whose passion for work is obsessive.  Harmonious passion is associated with higher levels of physical health, psychological well-being, self-reported self-esteem, positive emotions, creativity, concentration, flow, work satisfaction, and increased congruence with other areas of one's life. These effects spill over into other areas. Because people with harmonious passion can actively disengage from work and experience other parts of their lives, they report general positive affect over time. In contrast, those with obsessive passion display higher levels of negative affect over time and display more maladaptive behaviors. They report higher levels of negative affect during and after activity engagement; they can hardly ever stop thinking about their work, and they get quite frustrated when they are prevented from working. They also persist when it's risky to do so (just like a pathological gambler). A reason for this is that their work forms a very large part of their self-concept. To protect their selves, they display more self-protective behaviors, such as aggression, especially when their identity is threatened. Those with obsessive passion also have a more negative image of themselves, being quicker to pair the word "unpleasant" with "self" than those showing lower levels of obsessive passion. This suggests that their persistence doesn't come from a place of intrinsic joy, but an unstable ego. This distinction is critical to evaluate in ourselves. Harmonious passion is a wellspring we can draw from, while obsessive passion is an addictive compulsion that drains us. We need to understand and be clear about which type of passion is driving us at work. Key questions to ask ourselves here include: Are you getting intrinsic satisfaction from your work or do you feel like you have to constantly work to prove yourself? If it's the latter, you may be obsessive. Do you feel a compulsive need to work or are you able to easily disengage and enjoy other actitivies in your life?  Do you feel "driven," as opposed to "engaged"? Obsessive passion is about "addiction" to work. The more you feel you MUST be working, the more likely you are driven by obsessive passion, rather than harmonious passion.  On an organizational level, I think it could be a huge issue, too. Are we encouraging and rewarding people who are obsessive, rather than harmonious? How many workplaces, for example, seem to place a higher value on the obsessive type of passion? These are the people who have little work/life balance and feel a compulsion to work. In many organizations, these are the people who are rewarded and promoted and who end up setting expectations for their employees. If they are also the people more likely to bring negative behaviors to work, there's no wonder we are seeing more dysfunctional workplaces.  Sorting these two types of passion out is important for us to do, both individually and as organizations. Where do you think you stand?  ________________________________________________________________ Sign up for my online Career Clarity Camp, starting January 9. You'll get a chance to look at the role that work plays in your life and to see what you can do to find harmonious passion for your career. 

As we adapt to an ever-changing world, I've come to believe that a necessary career management skill is the ability to create your own job. Whether it's work you do for a company or work you do on your own, re-inventing yourself on a regular basis is going to become more and more important.  How to re-invent yourself  is the question, of course. Via Angela Maiers comes a link to an interesting report on Jobs of the Future that suggests three strategies for creating new jobs: Retrofitting--Adding new skills to an existing job. Blending--Combining skills from different jobs or industries to create new specialties. Problem-solving--Identifying key problems and then inventing jobs that will solve them.  I want to talk about each of these in a little more detail. Retrofitting for a New Job This is probably the easiest strategy to employ and for many of us working for a company or organization, the clues to retrofitting may lie in that "other duties as assigned" clause of the job description. Keep an eye out for ways in which you are being asked to stretch beyond your typical job duties. Is this something you could do more strategically? Watch what's happening with co-workers in similar jobs. Are there skills or duties they are developing that would be a good fit for you? Another thing to watch is the the trends in your occupation that may indicate a need to develop new skills. How can you combine those skills with your current job to create something new?  This is also where I think you look at your core strengths. What do you excel at? Is there a way to develop your current job into something that more closely matches those core strengths that in effect creates another job altogether?  Blending Your Way to a New Job This one is a little trickier, because it involves blending two different jobs or looking at two different industries. That means that you have to be much more willing to explore and be open to trends, skills and paradigms that occur outside of your particular industry and occupation.  In the past few years, I've been blending skills in social media with my core career and professional development skills. This has opened up new opportunities for me in the industries where I work, but it has required me to be open to and active in what's going on outside of my core profession. I've had to continually look at what's happening across industries and then look at how to adapt the skills, tools and processes for the places where I'm doing work.  If you're someone who's interested in and willing to expose yourself to a variety of industries and occupations, then blending your way to a new job can be a key strategy. I personally believe that this is also key to being innovative and creative in your work, but that's another post.  Problem-Solving Your Way to a New Job This strategy for creating new work may be the most difficult to do, but I think could also be the most rewarding and beneficial. There is no shortage of problems in our world and inventing work that solves those problems is a key way to make yourself indispensable.  To do this, you need to start looking for problems that people need solved. This can be surprisingly hard to do, as it requires us to be on the lookout for questions, complaints, etc. It means we have to be great listeners, something that many of us aren't terribly good at doing. I've found it helpful to spend time just talking with people, finding out what frustrates them, where they feel like they need help. In those conversations are the first inklings of the problems, at least as they are understood by those who have them.   Of course, once problems are identified, we also have to come up with solutions and find a way to turn that into a job. This is where it can be useful to be looking across industries and occupations and paying attention to trends. Often the seeds for solving a problem in one industry can be found in what's going on someplace else.  The problem-solving approach to job creation is one you can apply to working for yourself or for someone else.  One thing I've heard repeatedly from companies and organizations is that they need people who are problem-solvers. If you can combine skills and approaches to address a need, then you will be able to find a job.  This approach clearly lends itself to self-employment as well. It is the heart of enterprise, really, this ability to combine skills and talents to address specific problems.  Although I think there can be value to understanding and responding to job trends in the market, I think that in the end, there may be greater security and growth in creating your own work, by applying one or more of these ideas throughout your career. These strategies are also a way to play to your core strengths and passions, which can provide greater happiness and satisfaction at work.  _______________________________________________________________________ Sign up for my newsletter!   If you sign up now, you'll also get 15 days of activities to help you reflect on 2011 and plan for 2012.    

I've had a lot of conversations with people about the choices they face in their lives. We can spend hours trying to get clarity, trying to narrow choices and get to the heart of things. Days, weeks, months, even years can be spent trying to "figure things out."  Most of the time this process is for naught because they are chasing the wrong question. Instead of asking "what do I want to do?' they should be asking themselves "Why can't I bring myself to do what I know I want to do?" I've found that deep in their hearts, most people DO know what they want. The real problem is that they lack the will to do it--an entirely different problem.  If you truly don't know what you want to do, then by all means, explore and gather information. But, if you know in the deepest parts of yourself what you really want, but you're just afraid to go for it, then stop wasting time on getting clarity. Start looking at how you can find the courage to do what your heart already knows.  Clarity or courage--which is it you really need?  _______________________________________________________________________ Sign up for my newsletter!   If you sign up now, you'll also get 15 days of activities to help you reflect on 2011 and plan for 2012.  

Several weeks ago, I wrote a post on social artistry, on how I am shifting my understanding of what I do and how I do it, seeing myself more and more as a "social artist." Since then, I've been doing a lot of reading, thinking and exploring on the concept, particularly on how we can better use conversations for learning and to dig into the meaningful issues that we aren't addressing right now.  This has opened up a whole new world for me and how I think about the work that I do.  If I go back to what I loved initially about blogging, it was the opportunity to engage in meaningful discussions with other people through the comments and back and forth blog posts. If I look at my face-to-face work, it has always been about finding ways to facilitate and engage in meaningful conversations because in my experience, that's where learning and change take place. Always.  I'm currently reading Meg Wheatley's Walk Out Walk On: A Learning Journey into Communities Daring to Live the Future Now. In it, there's a chapter on Columbus, Ohio, where leaders are giving up on being heroes and learning to become hosts, instead.  You can read more about it here, but I wanted to pull a quote that gets at the concept of leader as host, not as hero.  America loves a hero. So does the rest of the world. Perhaps it’s our desire to be saved, to not have to do the hard work, to rely on someone else to figure things out. Constantly we are barraged by politicians presenting themselves as heroes, the ones who will fix everything and make our problems go away. It’s a seductive image, an enticing promise. And we keep believing it. Somewhere there’s someone who will make it all better. Somewhere, there’s someone who’s visionary, inspiring, brilliant, and we’ll all happily follow him or her. Somewhere . . . Well, it is time for all the heroes to go home, as the poet William Stafford wrote. It is time for us to give up these hopes and expectations that only work to make people dependent and passive. It is time to stop waiting for someone to save us. It is time to face the truth of our situation—that we’re all in this together, that we all have a voice—and figure out how to mobilize the hearts and minds of everyone in our communities. . .  If we want to transform complex systems, we need to abandon our exclusive reliance on the leaderas-hero and invite in the leader-ashost. Can leaders be as welcoming, congenial and invitational to the people who work with them as they’d be if they had invited them as guests to a party? Leaders who act as hosts rely on other people’s creativity and commitment to get the work done. Leaders-as-hosts see potential and skills in people that people themselves may not see. And they know that people will only support those things they’ve played a part in creating—that you can’t expect people to "buy in" to plans and projects developed elsewhere. Leaders-as-hosts invest in meaningful conversations among people from many parts of the system as the most productive way to engender new insights and possibilities for action. They trust that people are willing to contribute, and that most people yearn to find meaning and possibility in their lives and work. And these leaders know that hosting others is the only way to get largescale, intractable problems solved I hope you took the time to read that quote in it's entirety. It is profound. This is where I try to be, acting as a host, not a hero, on this blog and in the work that I do face-to-face and online. One thing I'm realizing, though, is how hard it is to play this role, especially when so many of us are looking for a hero to save us from the tough decisions and the hard work of figuring out where to go next. I see this a lot in the career creation work I do. People just want answers and I become the Answer Woman.  I'm clear that there's a part of me that WANTS to be the hero, to play this role. Most of us who are in the business of helping people tend to have at least a little bit of the savior complex in us because it makes us feel important and good about ourselves. But that's ego and it's not the best way to get things done.   What I'm seeing ever more clearly is how damaging this hero/expert dynamic can be. It implies that somehow the power for change  is in ME (or whoever else we are turning to for leadership), not within YOU. I know in my heart how wrong this is and I work hard to stay out of my tendency to be pedantic, to have all the answers. But I can tell you it's hard. And you have to be mindful of what you are doing.  I think that in many ways, I'm trying to be a good host, both on and off-line. But I see that there are places where I can make shifts, get better at inviting conversation and helping people feel welcome, rather than acting as though I'm the white knight riding in to save the day.  It's clear to me that as I transform my practice and the ways that I work with people in the world, I need to pay closer attention to how I act as a host. How do I invite and facilitate conversations? How do I create space for people to have meaningful discussions and gain from our collective wisdom?How do I become a better listener? Better at connecting conversations and people and building up the heroic potential in all of us, not just in my own ego?  This will be hard work, I think, but fun and exciting and where I need to go. I don't want to be the hero. I want to be the host. How can I be that with you? 

Accountabilty is the willingness to acknowledge that we have participated in creating, through comission or ommision, the conditions that we wish to see changed. Without this capacity to see ourselves as cause, our efforts become either coercive or wishfully dependent on the transformation of others.  Community will be created the moment we decide to act as creators of what it can become. This requires us to believe that this organization, neighborhood, community is mine or ours to create. This will occur when we are willing to ask the question "How have I contributed to the current reality?" Confusion, blame and waiting for someone else to change are a defense against ownership and personal power.                      --Peter Block, Civic Engagment and the Restoration of Community One of the most challenging practices I've been engaging in this year is asking myself "How have I contributed to the current reality?" Another way to ask the question is: What have I done to contribute to the very thing I complain about or want to change?  I've found that repeatedly trying to answer this question is both empowering and ego-threatening. It's also well worth continuing to ask.  It's empowering because it puts the power for changing the situation into my own hands, rather than having it rely on getting someone else to change. It gives me another avenue into figuring out how I can create a new situation or dynamic.  At the same time, it is ego-threatening because it invites me to consider the ways in which I am all the things I complain about the most. How am I apathetic or not present or too focused on problems or constantly complaining about what's wrong? How often am I critical, refusing to challenge my own world view, listening poorly and pushing my own agenda?   When it comes to career and work life, I've found that too easily, I can embrace the idea that bad situations are created by other people. I am the victim or else the savior, riding in to save the day. Either way, I am on one side of the situation and everyone else is on the other side. This "me vs. them" dynamic can be very damaging. Forcing myself to see how I co-create the very things I want to change, though, has given me another way to be.  It is teaching me to be more understanding and compassionate of where other people may be coming from. Not that I'm always able to feel this understanding, but when I can, it has shifted my interactions.  More importantly, it consistently reminds me that I must be clear about what I want more of and that I must embody those things in my interactions with people and situations where I want to see change.  I can't control what other people do, but I can bring more of what I want to create change.  For example, a few weeks ago, I asked where the meaningful conversations are at work. Since I asked that question, I've been looking at the ways that I have created situations where meaningless conversations continue. How much work do I put into crafting questions that help people go deeper? How am I expanding my skills and tools so that I create the space and opportunity for those kinds of conversations? How does my own inertia, sense of helplessness, difficulties with conflict and discomfort with being in a place where there are no clear answers contribute to these situations?  This question--how am I contributing to the situation I want to change?--has been one of my most powerful tools in shifting my understanding of how I fit into any situation. Not only can I see the negative ways in which I contribute, I also become accountable for finding the positive strategies I can use to shift the conversations.  This question is critical to my reflective practice. Although challenging to ask and answer, it's been well worth the effort.  ______________________________________________________________________ Career Clarity Camp starts January 9. Info on the Camp and the sign-up form are here. 

Given the work that I do, I'm a sucker for skill lists. As our work worlds grow ever more complex and challenging, it seems that the skills themselves become more complex too.  Increasingly, though, I've begun to believe that these lists are distracting us from the real skills of success. While working with big data, operating in virtual teams and"cognitive load management"all sound great, I think there are far more fundamental skills we should be developing first.  My 21st Century Skills List I think there are 6 fundamental skills we need to develop for success in this or any other century. I would also argue that we are not nearly as good at these skills as we think we are.  In no particular order, my 6 21st Century skills are: Self-Awareness Asking Questions Empathic Listening Authentic Conversation Reflection Seeking and working with multiple perspectives Let's take a closer look. 1. Self-Awareness We humans can be amazingly robotic. And by that I mean responding to commands and conditions without really questioning what we are doing or why we are doing it. This habit of going through life without really being aware of our own internal motivations, mental and emotional habits, assumptions and belief systems is remarkably common and remarkably damaging.  The first and most fundamental skill we need to develop is the ability to look inside to see how we respond to the external world. What are our values systems, assumptions and mental models? What strengths and gifts do we need to bring into the world? What are our habitual blind spots? What are our insecurities, vulnerabilities and sore points?  All of these aspects of ourselves, when they are unexamined and unacknowledged, contribute in major ways to our ability to function in the world. The more aware we are of our own mental and emotional processes, the more skilled we will be in all other areas.  2. Asking Questions I agree with Seth Godin that as adults, it is often stunning how few questions we ask. I'm not sure why. Maybe we think we know the answers already. Or maybe we just lose our sense of curiosity and wonder about the world.  What I do know is that our ability to ask good questions is critical to success, not only professionally but in our personal lives as well. And it's a skill we have to cultivate and refine, because the questions we ask will frame the solutions we find.  We first need to re-learn the practice of questioning, period. Too often we accept what we are told, without going any further. We also need to learn how to ask different kinds of questions--important questions, positive questions, reflective questions. We need to carefully cultivate and nurture our curiosity and use it to keep asking "why?," how?" and "what if?" We need to look at how we ask questions, when we ask them and what kinds of questions we ask. Developing our ability to question, rather than to simply accept what is, is the foundation of growth and development. It is also at the heart of creativity and innovation.  3. Empathic Listening Stephen Covey writes in The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People that we should "first seek to understand." He calls this empathic listening and it is the most difficult form of listening for us to cultivate.  It is not waiting for the other person to stop talking so you can relate your story.  It is not listening to find places where you agree or disagree. It is something much deeper than that:  The essence of empathic listening is not that you agree with someone; it's that you fully, deeply, understand that person, emotionally as well as intellectually. Empathic listening involves much more than registering, reflecting, or even understanding the words that are said. Communications experts estimate, in fact, that only 10% of our communication is represented by the words we say. Another 30 percent is represented by our sounds, and 60% by our body language. In empathic listening, you listen with your ears, but you also, and more importantly, listen with your eyes and with your heart. You listen for feeling, for meaning. You listen for behavior. You use your right brain as well as your left. You sense, you intuit, you feel. Raise your hand if you regularly engage in this form of listening. I know I don't, but that when I do, amazing things happen as a result. (See this excerpt for more on empathic listening)  4. Authentic Conversation Creating the space for authentic, meaningful conversations is one of the most valuable skills we can develop. Last week I wrote about moving from being a hero to being a host and when I talk about authentic conversation, I mean our ability to act as a host and participant in deep, authentic discussions. Conversations are how we learn and how we do our work. They are how we identify and solve problems and how we build collaboration and community. The capacity to create and hold the space for authentic discussion is under-valued and much needed in work and in our personal lives.  Self-awareness, questioning and empathic listening all contribute to our ability to engage in authentic, meaningful conversation. But there are other related skills and strategies we must employ.  Our ability to host and engage in authentic discussions is critical for success in and out of work.  5. Reflection On one level, the ability to reflect on your actions and work could be considered part of self-awareness. However I see reflective practice as something related, but separate. Self-awareness is one thing we can develop through and as part of our reflective practices, but reflection also is a skill that can help us develop more technical expertise, too.  Reflection is both an internal, introspective process, as well as a social one. Reflection can happen alone or in groups. It can happen while we are in the midst of action, as well as after the fact. Reflective practice helps us learn from experience and use our failures and mistakes as fodder for development, rather than for self-flagellation and blame. Reflective practitioners know what they don't know and can devise experiments and activities to help them continue developing. The ability to adapt to ever-changing and more complex environments is directly related to our capacity to effectively reflect on what we do and how we do it.  6. Seeking and Working with Multiple Perspectives Homophily--our human tendency to connect to people like ourselves--is both a blessing and a curse. It's important for us to find and connect to our tribes, yes. But we also benefit from our ability to seek out and work effectively with a diversity of perspectives and frames of reference. This is even more true in a global economy. I've written before about combating homophily and even as I've become increasingly aware of the negative impact of connecting to only those people who share my perspectives, I still find it difficult to intentionally create space for working with multiple viewpoints. Like most people, I tend to see people who have a different worldview as being "others." I either want to convert them to my own viewpoint or ignore them, neither of which is beneficial.  As a 21st century skill, I think we have to look at not only how we listen to and engage with people who see the world differently, we also need to look at the strategies we use to find and connect with them in the first place. How intentional are we about diversifying our networks? How effective are we? And more importantly, how willing are we to be shaped and influenced by these differences?    From a career perspective, I think it is these 6 skills that offer the most "bang for your buck." They are the skills needed for success in all aspects of our lives (not just at work) and they are core to most other skillsets.  As I think about 2012 and how I want to develop myself, it is these core areas that I will focus on. What do you think? How do these skills resonate with you? And what are you doing to develop them?  _______________________________________________________________________ Sign up for my newsletter!   If you sign up now, you'll also get 15 days of activities to help you reflect on 2011 and plan for 2012.  

(Socrates) introduced the idea that individuals could not be intelligent on their own, that they need someone else to stimulate them. . . His brilliant idea was that if two unsure individuals were put together, they could achieve what they could not do separately; they could discover the truth, their own truth, for themselves.                          --Theodore Zeldin, An Intimate History of Humanity For many years, I suffered from undiagnosed depression. Eventually medication and great therapy freed me from the worst effects, but one thing I discovered in the aftermath was that through the years of living with the disease I had learned to be alone. Depression causes us to isolate ourselves from other people. We feel like crap, think we are alone in feeling like crap, and so we learn the habits of withdrawal and loneliness. Just when we probably most need to be around other people, we are least likely to seek their support.  I was reminded of my years of withdrawal today as I prepare for my upcoming Career Clarity Camp. In the past year in particular, I've become acutely aware of our need as humans to come together for strength, support and conversation. Unfortunately, we are most likely to seek this when we are feeling good about ourselves and our lives. When we are confused or sad or angry or ashamed, we tend to withdraw, just at the moment when we most need human connection and understanding.  I love the quote above (via David Gurteen) because I think it captures perfectly what I've realized works so well--that when we bring together two unsure individuals, the truth--their truth--will emerge. The challenge for us is to be willing to come together in our uncertainty. We have to fight our natural tendency to withdraw in those moments of fear and confusion. The answers we seek lie within, but we are most likely to find them in pursuing our connection to others.  Learning alone, having reflection time is important. But even more critical is reaching out to others in our uncertainty and being willing to learn together. This is how we uncover our true brilliance.  _______________________________________________________________________ Join me in January to learn together about getting unstuck. I'll be running a 7-day course to create movement that will help you start to move toward the things you want most.  More information and the sign-up form are here. 

In the past few days, I've had several people tell me about new jobs and plans that are finally panning out for them. After weeks or months of muddling and messiness, they find themselves back on the road--and it feels good.  What shifted for them was that they became very clear about WHAT they wanted. They put work into clarifying their vision for the careers they wanted to create for themselves, what was important to them and what wasn't. They delineated what they needed and became willing to shed what they didn't.  In gaining clarity about the "What," they began to let go of HOW they would get there. They stopped putting energy into all the steps and worrying about how they could make their vision happen and just worked on the vision itself. Once they did that, the "How" began to move. In a few cases, this movement took them in surprising directions they hadn't anticipated. But they were willing to go with the flow and it took them to the "What" of their vision.  Why does this work? A few reasons, I think.  First, often when we are focusing on the "How," we are going in many different directions without a clear vision. We are a culture that values action over reflection and pursuing the "How" feels like we're doing something. But if we aren't clear about the "What," then our actions will be ineffective at best. We are engaging in activity, not real action.  I also believe that focusing on the "What" makes action clearer to us. All of a sudden the path is illuminated  because we are clear about exactly where we want to go, at least for the next few steps. We know what to leave behind and what to take with us. We know the steps we need to take.   Ultimately, though, the reason that focusing on "the What" works is because it is a focus on possibilities, not problem-solving. In his wonderful Civic Engagement and the Restoration of Community, Peter Block talks about the "Possibility Conversation": The possibility conversation frees people to create new futures that make a difference. Problem-solving and negotiation of interests makes tomorrow only a little different from today. Possibility is a break from the past and opens space for a future we had only dreamed of. It may be that declaring a possibility wholeheartedly is the transformation. The leadership task is to postpone problem-solving and stay focused on possibility until it is spoken with resonance and passion. As Werner Erhard has so clearly stated, the possibility works on us, we do not work on the possibility (my emphasis).  Focusing on "the What" is a focus on the possibilities, on the future. The clearer we are about those possibilities, the more passionately and wholeheartedly we can state those possibilities, the more that possibility will work on us.  If we want to create a future that makes a difference for ourselves and the people around us, we need to let go of tinkering and problem-solving around the edges. We need to define and embrace the power of "the What."  ______________________________________________________________________ If you want to embrace the power of the What for yourself, there are still a few openings in my upcoming Career Clarity Camp, which starts next Monday.  For more information and to sign up for the Camp, check out this link.