(This is the seventh installment in my twelve-part blog series A Leadership Vision for America) I’ve laid out the first secret that would help our leaders bring America back to a healthy state:  Create a compelling vision by knowing who we are (our purpose), where we’re going (our picture of the future), and what will guide our journey (our values). If our leaders had a clear, agreed-upon vision, it would help them set national goals they could focus on. But they shouldn’t try to figure everything out by themselves. That leads me to the second secret. The Second Secret: Treat Citizens as Your Business Partners Assumption: The more that people are "in the know," the greater their commitment to work together to help solve problems. In my work in the business world, one of the things that has bothered me the most is watching leaders of companies in financial trouble go behind closed doors and make all the decisions by themselves in an attempt to turn the situation around.  It’s amazing to talk to people in those organizations who didn’t even know there was a problem until major layoffs were announced. Those people certainly didn’t feel like business partners—they felt like victims. A lot of people don’t know that Southwest Airlines is over eighty percent unionized. When employees were first asked to vote on being union members, they came to cofounder Herb Kelleher to tell him what was going on. He said, "I love unions as long as they will let you sit on the same side of the table as me. If they want us to sit on opposite sides of the table, vote them down." Union leaders have been present at every leadership meeting I have attended at Southwest Airlines. That’s quite a different story from other airlines that fight with their unions or even declare bankruptcy to break union contracts. At Southwest, they are one big family of business partners. That’s why I think many Americans don’t trust politicians—because they don’t treat the American people as business partners. They don’t share information with us. We know we’re going through a difficult time but we don’t really know the facts. Politicians are sitting around Washington trying to figure out solutions to our problems and they haven’t asked us to help. My wife Margie and I were recently in Australia visiting a business colleague, Lindsay Fox, who founded Linfox Transport. When we first met Lindsay in 1977, his company was doing about $10 or $15 million in annual business. Today, Linfox does over $1 billion annually just in logistics—not only in Australia but also in countries all over Asia. He’s one of the most respected businessmen in Australia. Several years ago when Australia was having a big problem with unemployment, Australia’s then-prime minister asked Lindsay and the head of the trade union association to take to the road. They visited major cities and towns in Australia to share the facts about the unemployment problem and to try to convince business owners to provide work for unemployed people.  This approach helped generate over 60,000 new jobs. Why? Because they went to the people, shared the information, and asked for help. Lindsay was quoted as saying, "It’s incredible what you can do when you believe you can work through it. This is why it’s tremendously important to work with the government, with friends, and help people." Our leaders need to do the same thing. Be honest with us. Tell the American people what the issues are and then go to communities around the country, let us know how we can help, and listen to our suggestions. I guarantee you that the citizens of this country have lots of good ideas and are willing to work with our leaders to find solutions for America’s problems. Jack Bowsher, former Director of Education for IBM, agrees with my contention that Washington should treat our citizens as business partners. He argues, "To protect our way of life and our standard of living, we Americans must become more involved in seeking the truth about the key issues that are being debated and voted on at all three levels of our government." If our leaders in Washington would start seeing American citizens as true business partners, it’s amazing to think of what we could accomplish together. Would you agree? When it comes to getting America back on track, I believe involving every segment of society is essential. I’ll talk about that in my next post.

Thinking about reactive behaviors, I’m reminded of a paper I read in graduate school called "Today the earwig, tomorrow man."   I still love the title and was intrigued by the idea that understanding the behaviors of "simple" creatures might in some way lead to understanding human behaviors?     While there is utility in understanding how insects […]

(This is the eighth installment in my twelve-part blog series A Leadership Vision for America.) Our leaders need to create a clear, compelling vision for America. They also need to start treating Americans as true business partners. Now let’s look at the third secret for helping to fix Washington: The Third Secret: Involve Every Sector of Society Assumption: No problem can withstand the assault of sustained collective thinking and action. When I talk about sustained collective action, I’m talking about every sector of society being involved. The strategy to do this is an outgrowth of the thinking that went into Sam Williams’ and Eric Swanson’s book To Transform a City. (I’m currently working with Sam and a colleague of his, Mike Carlisle, on an initiative called Vision San Diego, with the goal of making San Diego truly "America’s Finest Region.") In their book, Williams and Swanson established that there are three primary sectors in our society, each having three domains.  They are: The Public Sector - government, military, and education The Private Sector - business, arts/entertainment, and media The Social Sector - faith community, nonprofit organizations, and families In the past, when it has come to finding solutions for city, state, or national problems, the focus has tended to be on only two of these nine domains—government and business. The self-serving mess we have in Washington is a perfect example. When people start believing that our problems can be solved only by government or by business, it dooms problem solving to failure because the other seven domains are on the outside looking in—and some of them have become our country’s most critical judges. Take the media, for example.  I’ll never forget when I participated in a Young Presidents’ Organization University program in Singapore in 1984. Prime Minister Lee Kuan Yew, the leader who transformed that country, spoke to us. He was prophetic when he said:  "I love the United States, but I’m worried about you. I don’t think you are going to get strong leaders in the future because your press does not understand the difference between freedom of speech and national integrity."  That was almost thirty years ago. I think if the media were invited in to be part of America’s problem-solving team, they wouldn’t feel the need to set themselves up as judge and jury for our leaders and everything the government is doing. The reality is that all nine domains of society need to be involved for real problem solving to take place. Next time I’ll explain the difference between Bounded Set and Centered Set decision-making philosophies.

(This is the ninth installment in my twelve-part blog series A Leadership Vision for America.) In my last post I stated that business and government can’t solve all of America’s problems by themselves. Ideally, our leaders in Washington would involve every sector of society in problem solving. The three sectors encompass nine different domains: The Public Sector, represented by government, military, and education The Private Sector, represented by business, arts/entertainment, and media The Social Sector, represented by the faith community, nonprofit organizations, and families When Eric Swanson and Sam Williams were working on their book To Transform a City, they come across a very interesting philosophy about problem-solving relationships. Paul Hiebert from Fuller Seminary discovered in the 1970s that when people come together to solve a problem, they often have a "closed circle" philosophy, or what he called a Bounded Set. A bounded-set thinker asks the question, "Do you believe like I believe?"  This becomes a divisive question because it separates those who are in from those who are out, limiting people who are allowed to work on the problem to those who sign off on an agreed-upon belief.  Whether it’s political, religious, or some other type of personal conviction—unless you believe what we believe, you can’t work on the problem. This philosophy doesn’t work because it is exclusive, not inclusive. The weeding-out process continues, the circle keeps getting smaller, and the problem doesn’t get solved. A more productive way to look at problem-solving relationships is an open philosophy Hiebert referred to as a Centered Set. A centered set has no boundary that defines who is in and who is out. The question that determines if you are part of the problem-solving group is, simply, "Do you care about what I care about?" This philosophy works because it is inclusive of all belief systems and focuses on the matter at hand: Are you concerned about the problem we want to focus on? How would this work in Washington?  It would be the job of the president and the legislature to first identify the key problem areas that need to be focused on to help keep America prosperous and safe. Next, they would select key people from each of the nine domains, whether inside or outside their own ranks, who care about each of the areas selected. Each of these groups would work with other American citizens to develop strategies to solve each of the key problems or concern issues going forward. The people working together could have all different kinds of personal convictions about things as long as they were all passionate about the key problem area they were working together on—whether it be the economy, homeland security, unemployment, affordable housing, balancing the budget, improving the educational system, or another important issue. Identifying leaders from each of the domains to work on each problem highlights the fact that no one segment of the population can solve all of America’s problems. In fact, one of my favorite sayings is, "None of us is as smart as all of us." A perfect example of someone who lived and breathed this philosophy was William Wilberforce, who helped stop slavery in England. It took twenty years. He traveled the country on horseback and got to know key leaders from all of the different domains. He didn’t care what they believed politically, religiously, or economically—all he asked the leaders was whether they agreed with him that slavery was wrong.  If they agreed, he would help them determine how they could influence important people within different segments of society and get them on the "stop slavery" bandwagon. This led to a number of people from diverse backgrounds coming together to put an end to slave trading and ultimately abolish slavery in their country altogether. This is the type of process our government leaders need to put into action to deal with today’s pressing issues. Right now, Washington seems to be dominated by the bounded-set philosophy, where "you have to believe what I believe" to even begin to work together on a problem, let alone agree on a solution. So you have one big bounded-set group, the Democrats, at odds with another big bounded-set group, the Republicans. The only way to get anywhere is through compromise. What makes this third secret for fixing Washington so powerful is that it focuses on sustained collective action by all segments of society. Next time I’ll bring it all together with the fourth secret for fixing Washington, which involves a practice that’s near and dear to my heart:  servant leadership.

My last few blogs have focused on aspects of Artificial Intelligence (AI) that are often neglected or misused. Topics like reactive behaviors, situation awareness, and transparency. But all of these topics sit against a backdrop of AI that has persisted since its earliest years. The great mathematician and computer scientist, Alan Turing, envisioned machines that […]

(This is the tenth installment in my twelve-part blog series A Leadership Vision for America.) Now let’s look at the fourth and final secret for fixing Washington. This secret will encompass and bring to life the first three secrets. The Fourth Secret: Elect Servant Leaders Assumption: The more that our leaders are in Washington to serve and not be served, the better chance we have to mend what’s wrong with our country. The world is in desperate need of a different leadership role model. Everyone has seen the negative effects of self-serving leaders in every segment of our society. In fact, to a great extent, the whole economic downturn has been the result of self-serving leaders through the years who thought all the money, recognition, power, and status should move up the hierarchy in their direction, and everyone else be damned. Yet, when I mention servant leadership to people, they often think it means the inmates are running the prison, or trying to please everybody, or even some type of religious movement.  They think you can’t lead and serve at the same time. Yet you can, if you understand that there are two parts to servant leadership: A visionary, or strategic, role—the leadership aspect of servant leadership An implementation, or operational, role—the servant aspect of servant leadership The first secret for fixing Washington—having a compelling vision—was focused on the visionary/strategic, or leadership, aspect of servant leadership. Once an organization has a compelling vision, they can set goals and define strategic initiatives that suggest what people should be focusing on right now. With a compelling vision, these goals and strategic initiatives take on more meaning and therefore are not seen as a threat, but as part of the bigger picture. The traditional hierarchical pyramid is effective for the leadership aspect of servant leadership. People look to their organizational leaders for direction, as Americans look to Washington. While leaders should involve experienced people in shaping vision/direction, goals, and strategic imperatives, the ultimate responsibility remains with the leaders themselves and cannot be delegated to others. Implementation/operational leadership, or the servant aspect of servant leadership—living according to the vision and direction—is where most leaders and organizations get into trouble. With self-serving leaders at the helm, the traditional hierarchical pyramid is kept alive and well, leaving the customers uncared for at the bottom of the hierarchy. All the energy in the organization moves up the hierarchy as people try to please and be responsive to their bosses, leaving the customer contact people to be "ducks," "quacking" and saying things like, "It’s our policy," "I just work here," "I didn’t make the rules," or "Do you want to talk to my supervisor?" Servant leaders, on the other hand, feel that their role is to help people achieve their goals. They intuitively know that effective implementation requires turning the hierarchical pyramid upside down so the customer contact people are at the top of the organization and can be responsible—able to respond and soar like eagles—while leaders serve and are responsive to the needs of their people, helping them to accomplish goals and live according to the vision/direction, goals, and strategic imperatives of the organization. Since the customer contact people are "in the know," they see themselves as your responsible business partners and, therefore, are committed to not only serving customers but to solving problems. This is what the second and third secrets of fixing Washington are all about:  We must treat our citizens as our business partners and involve all segments of society to solve our problems. To wrap up my Leadership Vision for America series, I’ll have some final thoughts for you next time and then a special message on November 3. Let me know what you think!

Most who follow Artificial Intelligence (AI) have heard of the Turing Test. This test was first postulated by Alan Turing, the brilliant British mathematician, as a test for machine intelligence. His simple test has human judges using a terminal to communicate to either another human sitting at a terminal[1] or an intelligent computer. If the […]

As an AI company, Discovery Machine employees are often confronted with the question: "Where’s the AI?" I suspect this question could only arise from those not following our blog. The question, however, is really about some preconceived idea of AI, which unfortunately could be one of many. It can therefore leave its recipient stupefied and […]

I made a trip to Washington, D.C. a few weeks ago. It was a really interesting time to be there—just before a presidential election. I heard a lot of negative statements and a lot of worry about the economy and the election and the state our country is in.  So I want to show you a quote someone sent to me: "The national budget must be balanced. The public debt must be reduced; the arrogance of the authorities must be moderated and controlled. Payments to foreign governments must be reduced, if the nation doesn’t want to go bankrupt. People must once again learn to work, instead of living on public assistance." Do you know who gets credit for that statement?  Cicero, who supposedly said it in 55 B.C.! I’m strangely comforted by the fact that the world has had some of these same problems for centuries. So I made a choice to come away from Washington, D.C. feeling positive about the future. I think we’re going to pull through this. We’ve got a great country—we can pull out of this debt and solve these problems—particularly if we all hang in there together.  I was so impressed by New Jersey Governor Chris Christie when he stated publicly this past week that Barack Obama was "outstanding to deal with" in the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy. Even though Governor Christie is a Republican and a staunch supporter of Mitt Romney, he didn’t play politics; he praised Obama because he felt praise was due. I thought it was refreshing and I think the American people would love to see more examples of this kind of non-partisan collaboration among our leaders. If our national leaders all had this kind of cooperative mentality, we could pull together and overcome any obstacle in our path. We shouldn’t need something like a hurricane to bring American leaders together as problem-solving partners. My friend Hyrum Smith recently reissued his 2004 book with the title Pain is Inevitable; Misery is Optional.  That’s tied in with what I believe about our country’s difficulties.  Let’s realize that pain is inevitable—problems are inevitable—but misery is optional.  We don’t have to play the blame game. We can choose to be compassionate and loving and caring. When people want you to join in a pity party about how bad everything is in the country, you can choose not to engage.  You can say, "Okay, what can we do to try and make a positive difference in our own community?" and encourage others to be part of the solution. So, choose to be positive and to do something about it - and right now, doing something means we all have to get out and vote.  Vote any way you want—just vote.  Decide who you think can really make a difference and help us turn the country around. And don’t forget about the local elections and issues—those are just as important as what’s happening nationally. We can each make a difference where we are. We can be leaders where we’re planted. Encourage others around you and choose to stay positive. And remember to vote on Tuesday!

In Sondheim’s musical Sunday in the Park with George, the lead character sings "Putting it together, that’s what counts. The art of making art is, putting it together." This is true in AI as in art. My last four blogs have talked about many facets of AI, including reactions, situation awareness, communication and knowledge representation. […]

Over the past few weeks I have argued that AI is a holistic endeavor, that to create useful AI entities for use in simulation or for use as decision aides or coaches requires that they address communication, situational awareness, and have significant knowledge focused on specific expertise. These Communicating Artificial Situated Expert (CASE) agents, if […]

This week brings one of my very favorite holidays—Thanksgiving. I love it because it’s not focused on gifts and things like that. It’s about what everyone brings to the table. You pass around the turkey and the dressing and all, and it’s a chance for everyone to really express what they are thankful for. I hope you’ll be able to do that. I’m thankful that I live in this country. I’m thankful that I had a wonderful mom and dad who always lifted me up and a great sister who encouraged me constantly. I’m grateful that I met my wife Margie and she’s been my companion and my love and my partner for over fifty years now—it’s unbelievable. I’m thankful for our son Scott and our daughter Debbie and what they’ve brought to my life, and all of our grandkids who are all really special. I’m blessed to have a sweet little dog, Joy, who is a perfect example of unconditional love. I’m thankful for a wonderful God who loves me and loves you and loves all of us. I’m grateful that I’m healthier and in better shape than I have been in years. I’m thankful for everyone in our company. I think we’ve created a wonderful place and we want to continue to build on that as we go forward. We’re all in it together and we support each other. I like to say, "Life is a very special occasion—don’t miss it." Part of that is being thankful for the blessings you have. It doesn’t mean that there aren’t troubles along the way. But life is a very special occasion. Every day when we wake up we need to be thankful that we have another day to share and be with people and maybe make a difference. So this week, reach out to the people you really care about and love, and tell them you care. I’m wishing you all the very best and I’m thankful that we all have an opportunity to make a difference in the world. Have a wonderful holiday. Recognize how blessed you are and reach out and tell people that you love them.  Take care.

This morning I realized I lost my wallet.  I’m sure you can all identify with this, either losing keys, wallet or something when you are trying to rush out the door to get to work.  I searched frantically in all the normal places, but couldn’t find it anywhere.  I was getting more mad and frustrated […]

Two great men who were mentors and friends to me passed away this year—Stephen R. Covey in July and Zig Ziglar just this past week. I’d like to share a few thoughts about these wonderful guys. Stephen Covey was a devoted husband to his wife, Sandra, and dedicated father of nine, grandfather of fifty-two, and great-grandfather of six. He was also a great friend and colleague to many, including me. A great memory I have of Steve was when we did a session together in Salt Lake City. During my presentation, I talked about how the most popular management philosophy was "Seagull Management," where managers don’t come around until something goes wrong—and then they fly in, make a lot of noise, dump on everybody, and fly out.  That line normally got a good laugh from audiences, but not this time. Then Steve whispered to me, "Ken, the seagull is the state bird of Utah." Oops!  He later told me about the role the seagull played in Mormon history.  When the early Mormons were settling in Utah and planting their fields, they were plagued by swarms of locusts that began eating all of their crops. The people thought they were going to starve to death. At one point they looked up and saw a huge cloud of seagulls flying toward them. They thought the seagulls were coming to finish off what the locusts hadn’t eaten.  Instead, the seagulls ended up eating all of the locusts, saving the settlers’ harvest and their very lives. Steve even took me to the place in downtown Salt Lake City where they have a statue of a seagull. Steve was such an inspiration and a teacher to so many.  He was a giant in our field and a very special human being.  His legacy here on earth will go on for years to come. Zig Ziglar had a big impact on me. During the times we were on the platform together, he modeled for me that it was okay to share my faith as long as I wasn’t trying to convert folks. He told me, "Your faith is part of who you are, and people want to know what makes you tick and what is important in your life." When I was 65, I called Zig because Margie and I had been invited to the 59th Anniversary of his 21st birthday. I asked him, "Zig, are you going to retire?" I will never forget his reply: "There’s no mention of retirement in the Bible!  Except for Jesus, Mary, Joseph, and David, nobody in the Bible under 80 years of age made much of an impact. I’m not retiring—I’m re-firing!"  What a difference his phrase of "re-firing" has made in my life the last eight years.  I quote him all the time. In fact, I’m working on a book on "re-firement" and my coauthor and I are going to dedicate the book to Zig. One last thing I learned from Zig.  He once told me, "I never met a golf game I didn’t like."  Ever since, I play a lot of N.A.T.O. golf—Not Attached To Outcome—and I enjoy the game so much more. He was an inspiration to everyone fortunate enough to meet him. It’s always tough to lose important people in our lives. I think the best way to honor them is to make sure you reach out—today—to the people you love, and tell them how important they are. As Margie says: "Keep your I-love-yous up to date." You’ll never regret it.

In some circles of AI research the entirety of intelligence can be described as reactive.  This approach to AI finds its inspiration in evolution. The thought is that by starting with our ancient ancestors (lizards and mice) and figuring out how they behave, we can successively build upon their reactive processes to those that appear […]

An attempt discriminates!

Crowd modeling and swarm modeling have been used in simulation since the 1960s. I recall seeing a swarm model applied to a simulated flock of birds at a SIGGRAPH conference in the early 1990s. It was amazing to see such a realistic looking flock of birds emerge from fairly simple mathematical models. Each bird is […]

This has been a tough time for me, losing great friends like Steve Covey, Zig Ziglar, and now my friend and mentor, Paul Hersey. I met Paul in 1966 when I worked at Ohio University as the assistant to the Dean of the College of Business, Harry Evarts. It was my first job out of my doctoral program. Paul was chairman of the Management department. The reason I took an administrative job was because all of my professors had told me if I wanted to work at a university, I should be an administrator since I couldn’t write. They thought it would be hard for me to be a professor due to the well-known adage "If you don’t publish, you perish." When I got to campus, though, Dean Evarts told me he wanted me to teach a course like all the rest of his assistants had done. I had never thought about teaching. He put me in Paul Hersey’s department and Paul gave me a basic management course to teach. After a couple of weeks of teaching, I came home and told my wife Margie, "This is what I ought to be doing. This is great. I should be a teacher." She said, "What about the writing?" I said, "I don’t know. I’ll have to work something out." I had heard that Paul taught a fabulous course on leadership, so in December 1966 I went up to him in the hall and told him I’d love to sit in on his class the following semester. He said to me, "Nobody audits my course. If you want to take it for credit, you’re welcome to do that." Then he walked away. I thought, That’s really something. I’ve got a Ph.D. and he doesn’t, and he wants me to take his course! So I went home and told Margie about it. She said, "Is he any good?"  I said, "He’s supposed to be fabulous." She said, "Then get your ego out of the way and take his course!" I had to convince the registrar to let me into the course, since I already had a Ph.D.  So I took the course and wrote the papers. In June 1967, after the course was over, Paul came into my office and said, "Ken, I’ve been teaching leadership for ten years and I think I’m better than anybody. But I can’t write. I’m a nervous wreck because they want me to write a textbook. I’ve been looking for a good writer like you to write it with me. Would you do it?" I laughed and said, "We ought to be some team. You say you can’t write and I’ve been told I’m not able to. Let’s do it!" So Paul and I sat down and wrote Management of Organizational Behavior: Utilizing Human Resources. It recently came out in its 10th edition and it sells more today than it ever has. It’s been a wonderful legacy for both of us. That was my start as a writer. If it weren’t for Paul Hersey, I wouldn’t be doing what I’m doing today. I owe so much to him. That book introduced Situational Leadership®, a leadership model that has been taught to hundreds of thousands of students since its inception. Even though The Ken Blanchard Companies now teaches Situational Leadership® II while Paul’s company, Center for Leadership Studies, has held on to the original Situational Leadership® model, we really have been "co-petitors" instead of competitors through the years because we valued each other and the way we thought. I’m so fortunate that Paul Hersey came into my life. I’ll miss him.

From Watson winning Jeopardy; to Siri, Cortana, and Google Now directing our lives, artificial intelligence (AI) is embedded in almost everything we do. It is inspiring technological changes at unprecedented rates and altering our perceptions of what is possible. It is no different in the simulated training community. Serious games to train soldiers and virtual assistants […]

With spring around the corner, I find my mind turning to golf. I love to play golf. I’ve always tried to not take it too seriously and remember that it’s just a game—but I didn’t really love to play until I started to use an approach called NATO golf. In case you haven’t heard of it before, NATO stands for Not Attached To Outcome. When you’re attached to outcome, you might be having a good game but then you hit the ball wrong and find yourself focusing on the wrong things—every move you make, every breeze, every bump in the grass. It really tightens you up and you can’t perform as well. You become fearful of your results because you believe that who you are depends on how you score or play that day. I can’t tell you how much more fun it is to play NATO golf than to grind my teeth over the score. It doesn’t mean I’m not interested in hitting good shots or scoring well—but I know that I am not my score. I am not each shot. As a result, I’m much more relaxed and able to swing freely at the ball without fear. I play so much better when I’m not worried about whether I’m going to be able to hit that hole or make that putt. I just get up there and let it happen. It’s beautiful. Golf is always interesting to me, because I believe golf is a lot like life. Think about it. Sometimes you’re playing better than you should, so you learn how to deal with success.  Sometimes you’re playing worse than you should, so you learn how to deal with failure.  Sometimes you get good breaks you don’t deserve and sometimes you get good breaks you do deserve.  Sometimes you get bad breaks you don’t deserve and sometimes you get bad breaks you do deserve.  All in four and a half hours!  Ha! And one of the best ways to get to know somebody is to play golf with them and watch how they behave. It says a lot about a person. In life, as in golf, sometimes we get so focused on outcome that we don’t enjoy the ride.  We’re so uptight about the importance of the outcome that we miss the dance of life, the dance of relationships, the dance of the sales call, or the dance of doing a seminar. Mark Twain said, "Golf is a good walk spoiled." I can’t say that I agree. Golf is a wonderful game as long as you don’t start believing that who you are is dependent on how you score. Don’t get attached to outcome—just be who you are and you will be amazed at how much more you’ll enjoy the game of golf—and the game of life.

The human mind is unique in its ability to interpret the world around us. This gives humans the ability to see things, observe details, interpret surroundings, and project future possibilities based on the information at hand. As demands for serious games and virtual training continue to rise, an increased level of realism is also required. […]

A common problem in the gas and oil industry today is an inability to affordably harness the knowledge of key experts in a timely fashion. Unfortunately, failure to do so often results in unsafe, accident-prone working environments. The cold reality is that there is not enough time to adequately train novices, continue operations, and comply […]

I was talking with some friends at a recent morning men’s group. Our focus was on the importance of being connected to other people and what it means. We came up with five things we think help you really get connected to others—at work, and in all aspects of life. How would you rate yourself in these five areas? Listen more than you speak.  We talked about listening a lot. If God wanted you to speak more than listen, he would have given you two mouths! Praise other people’s efforts.  This one has always been so important to me. Catch people doing things right.  That really helps you get connected with people. Show interest in others.  It’s not all about you. Find out about people and their families and learn about what’s happening in their lives. Be willing to share about yourself.  In our book Lead with LUV, my coauthor and former Southwest Airlines president Colleen Barrett said that people admire your skills but they really love your vulnerability. Are you willing to share about yourself?  I think being vulnerable with people is really important. Ask for input from others—ask people to help you.  People really feel connected if they can be of help to you. As a leader, there are many skills you need to develop but building relationships is the most important thing.  What can you do this week to listen more, praise other people’s efforts more, show interest in others, share about yourself and ask for input?  Give it a try.  You’ll be surprised at the difference it makes in your ability to connect with others!

One of the books I’m working on this summer is a customer service book with Kathy Cuff and Vicki Halsey tentatively titled I Care—Do You?: The Essentials of Delivering Legendary Service. A recent experience I had at my vacation home in upstate New York beautifully illustrates what we are trying to capture with this new book. I was driving the car we use up here when the light came on and said I needed an oil change and the air pressure in the tire was down.  So I took it over to a local service station about fifteen minutes from our cottage for an oil change and to have the tire checked.  Bob, who owns the place, is a fabulous guy. While my car is being looked at I asked, "How’s business going?" and Bob replied, "Amazingly well—but some of the other folks I talk to, it’s not so good." And I said, "The reason, Bob, is because you are such a fabulous guy with your customers.  You really care and so do your people." He said, "We really try. Our main goal is to do what the customers need and take care of them."  Then his mechanic came to me and said, "I just checked the car. The alert system didn’t take into consideration that the car was sitting around all winter.  You don’t really need an oil change for another 4000 miles. I checked the oil and it looks fine, but you do need a New York State inspection, so I’ll just give you that."  I was out of there in about twenty minutes. I went over to Bob as I was leaving and said, "Here’s a perfect example of what I was telling you.  You could have gone ahead and changed the oil—it would have been a lot better financially for you—but your guy said, "No, I don’t really need it." Bob said, "We find that when we take care of the customers it might cost us money in the short run, but it comes back in the long run." That’s another great example of how a small business - or any business - thrives when its people have an "I care—do you?" mindset around customers. So make sure you take care of your customers.  And remember, we don’t have just external customers; we have internal customers, too.  Who are the people that use your services?  How can you be most helpful to them?